You Want Me To Do What?! Forgive?!
Simply put I was bitter! PERIODTTT! How could a best friend suddenly become a
certified ✔️opponent? How could the loyalty I had given for over 15 years be
regarded as "never being there for me?" I've always been there for anyone
I considered my family. These were the thoughts that went through my head as I laid
on my bed all teary eyed, angry, and more so really hurt. Being turned
against is never a good feeling and broken relationships can almost feel
like someone died. All these feelings for me turned into something I never
thought I had an issue with……unforgiveness. I thought I could forgive
easily until that someone extremely close to me absolutely hurt me. My
heart literally, physically, felt heavy and whenever I heard their name I
was heated, these were signs of unforgiveness. There was nothing anyone
could tell me to make me let it go. So, I decided I'm going to lay down and
just talk to God and ask Him to teach me to forgive.
While praying, it felt like a flood of thoughts just came to me on how to
forgive. I realized the Lord gave me insight on this forgiveness thing. So
I'm sharing with you today the 3 keys I received when it comes to learning how to forgive.
1. Give up your right to be angry.
You may very well be right. Matter of fact, you probably were the one that was
offended, and the other person did indeed hurt you. But you must now let
go of that right to be angry in order to receive freedom. Only an empty
container can be filled. So holding onto to that right to be upset hinders
forgiveness from coming into your heart. Willingly choose to no longer be
upset and give up that offense. Open the cage of your heart and allow that
unforgiveness to fly away. Tell the Lord that you are ready to let it go and
watch Him work on your heart.
2. Forgive, Forget, BUT do not forget the lesson that you’ve learned.
“I’m going to forgive but I’ll never forget” that statement, is an ERROR. We
can never heal if we continuously replay the scenario of offense in our
mind. Anytime I faced any difficulty my mother would always say “ Ask
God what He wants you to learn from it”. And the truth is the Bible says in
James 1: 2-4
2. Consider it nothing but joy, my brothers and sisters,
whenever you fall into various trials. 3 Be assured that the testing
of your faith [through experience] produces endurance [leading
to spiritual maturity, and inner peace]. 4 And let endurance have
its perfect result and do a thorough work, so that you may be
perfect and completely developed [in your faith], lacking in
nothing. AMP version.
There is a lesson in every single experience we endure even in our hurt and
disappointment. So assess the situation, see what lesson you have learned
and what wisdom you have obtained because now you are going to make smarter
moves and respond wiser when new situations arrive. I learned
from my experience that I put way toooo much trust in human
beings. I somehow had this false idea that those closest to me
could never ever turn their back on me because we were “family”
but I learned that is not necessarily true. I was reminded that
people make mistakes and I should always be ready to forgive
and put my trust fully and only in Jesus alone. He can not fail!!! He
doesn’t even know how to fail!!! And this period of pain caused to
me to seek God so much deeper. I began to just listen to
sermons, attend Bible studies, read my Bible and make notes,
listen to Christian worship music, pray more, fast more and my
life honestly has never been the same. I can now say that I’m
actually very grateful for the pain because I would have never
pushed so close into the arms of Jesus. So, assess the situation
and see what you can learn, after that stop replaying the scenario
in your mind, stop discussing it with people. Give it NO attention
because that is the only way to forget about it.
3. A paper cut wound does not heal as fast as a surgical wound.
Some things take time. The healing process can be quick, or it
can take some months and that it is OKAY. Don’t rush it because
deep wounds heal over time. Allow God to heal you by pressing
into His presence. The more time you spend with Him the more
healing takes place. A mistake we make if when we are bruise we
look to people to fill a void and give us encouragement. We need
to run into the arms of God first and He will send the right people
your way to give you the boost you need. Do not put a time
constraint on your healing process. Give God time to work on you
and your character and to heal your heart.
Isaiah 40: 31 KJV
“ 31 But they that WAIT upon the LORD shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not
be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.”
You have to wait on God by literally spending time every day in prayer and
worship. The restoration process is not always overnight, and we
must learn to be alright with that. Just rest assured that your
healing is complete by our Lord Jesus and no one else.
By: Grace T
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